Mars Attracts: The Chaotic Theme Park Sim You Need to Play

Last Updated: October 20, 2025

Forget meticulously planned rollercoasters and pristine pathways. In the chaotic management sim Mars Attracts, you're not just building a theme park; you're orchestrating an intergalactic tourist trap based on the iconic Mars Attacks! franchise, and your main attractions are humans abducted from throughout history.

Released to the delight of fans of the cult-classic B-movie, Mars Attracts offers a brilliantly fresh take on the theme park genre. The game masterfully captures the chaotic, dark-humor spirit of its source material. As the Martian park manager, your job is to create the ultimate vacation destination for extraterrestrial visitors. This means saucer-shaped rides, alien-themed snacks, and, most importantly, a steady supply of fresh "exhibits"—unwitting humans plucked from various historical eras to serve as both attractions and staff.

This isn't your grandma’s theme park; it’s a hilarious and surprisingly strategic simulation where balancing the books means balancing utter mayhem.

Managing the Mayhem

Building a successful Martian theme park requires more than just placing rides and food stalls. You'll need to manage your alien workforce, keep your human chattel and Martian guests happy, and ensure the park remains structurally intact after the inevitable invasions and ray gun malfunctions. It's a delicate balance between providing top-tier entertainment and preventing a complete meltdown.

The game's humor is its strongest asset. From the wry descriptions of attractions featuring confused cavemen to the hilariously over-the-top reactions of your alien clientele, every aspect is infused with a tongue-in-cheek sensibility that perfectly honors the original film and trading cards. Instead of the usual meticulous planning, you're constantly battling unexpected events. Will it be a sudden meteor shower? A rogue flying saucer crash? Or perhaps just a particularly grumpy alien tourist demanding a refund after being zapped by a faulty attraction? The surprises never end.

A Surprisingly Deep & Addictive Experience

While the core gameplay revolves around familiar theme park simulator mechanics, Mars Attracts introduces a unique layer of strategic depth. The constant threat of Martian mischief and the unpredictable nature of your human "employees" keep the experience engaging and prevent it from becoming repetitive. What begins as a simple management sim quickly evolves into a captivating strategy game where you'll find yourself constantly adapting and improvising to keep your park running smoothly (or at least, not completely exploding).

In a world saturated with management sims, Mars Attracts has successfully carved out its own unique niche. Its quirky humor, strategic depth, and wonderfully chaotic gameplay make it a standout title that appeals to both die-hard fans of the franchise and newcomers alike. If you’re looking for a management game that’s as challenging as it is bizarrely fun, look no further than this out-of-this-world gem.