Earthworm Jim 3D Review: A 27-Year-Old Lesson in Frustration

Sometimes, games come into your life at the wrong time. Maybe you are too young, too busy, or simply too preoccupied to appreciate them. Usually, these are the titles worth revisiting years later to see if your perspective has changed. And then, there is Earthworm Jim 3D.

Twenty-seven years after its initial launch, I revisited this title to see if my childhood memories of its difficulty were just a case of me being bad at the game. The verdict? No, it was the game that sucked, not me. Earthworm Jim 3D is a masterclass in how not to transition a 2D platformer into the third dimension, and it remains an actively miserable experience in 2026.

A Psychedelic Mind-Trip Beneath the Surface

To give the game its due, the concept is undeniably strange and somewhat fun in a "what were they thinking" sort of way. After a flying-cow-related accident, Jim is trapped inside his own mind, forced to navigate four distinct areas: Memory, Happiness, Fear, and Fantasy. Each section features two levels and a boss fight, tasking you with collecting marbles and golden udders while dealing with bizarre objectives, like rescuing blue boxer briefs or helping a cucumber king escape prison.

There is a psychedelic, "huffing paint" energy here that I suspect was the charm of the original 2D games. Unfortunately, that charm is completely suffocated by the game’s technical execution.

The War Against the Camera

The primary antagonist of Earthworm Jim 3D isn't any of the bosses—it’s the camera. With only one-eighth camera turns available and an extremely narrow field of view, you are constantly fighting to keep the action in focus. Combine that with "tanky" controls that feel completely out of place for a platformer, and you have a recipe for frustration.

Whether you are attempting precise platforming puzzles or engaging in frantic multi-enemy combat, the game actively refuses to let you have a good time. As for the boss fights? Let’s just say that surviving the third pig-surfing encounter is enough to give anyone an aneurysm. Even the ending, which features our hero waking up only to be crushed by another falling cow, feels like a final, cruel joke on the player.